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Tuesday, October 16, 2012

31 Days of Horror: 7 Things You Should Know Before Watching AND SOON THE DARKNESS

1. The opening theme song is not indicative of the film's score as a whole.  Nor is it an accurate indicator of the type of film you are about to watch.  Judged by its theme song, one could easily be led to believe that And Soon The Darkness is a cheeky British farce, with fat, bespectacled men in bathing costumes falling off of various items and scantily clad women scurrying about, batting their eyes and frowning like disappointed toddlers who've just dropped an ice cream cone on the hot planks of a seaside boardwalk.  You'll be tempted to shut the movie off, but don't.  Stick with it.  Tough it out.  Hell, fast forward if you have to.  You're not going to miss anything.  They're just riding bikes around or whatever.

2. The film's two leading ladies are, in fact, cute, just, you know, in that late-60's/early-70's British way.  But trust me, they're supposed to be attractive.

3. The absence of subtitles is kind of the point.  It plunks the viewer down in the grimy outskirts of the Paris countryside with our heroines, leaving us feeling stranded and scared.  Unless you're French.  If you're French, I guess you can understand exactly what everybody is saying.  Probably not as offputting, unless what they're saying is really scary or perverted.  I bet it is perverted.  This is France after all.

4. Of course its slow, dummy.  They're building something!!!

5. Yes, the British expatriate lady is a red herring of the most dubious kind, but only after the credits roll and we are revisited by a reprise of the opening theme (Now you may shut it off).  It is then that we realize this character is complete bullshit.  But while we're in the thick of things, the dread this creepy lady creates is some of the dreadiest dread ever committed to film.  Seriously, I wonder what's going on at that house of hers.  She's up to something.

6. Every 70's horror/thriller is gonna have a little rape in it.  I'm not saying that it's a good or bad thing, I'm just stating a fact.

7. And Soon The Darkness is only predictable because you've seen so many movies, nerd!  I had the ending figured out a couple different ways, and while I don't disagree that the film is a titch on the predictable side, I would argue that it is predictable in the least offensive way possible.

Now that I've totally ruined it for you, enjoy And Soon The Darkness.

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