Hey, guys. Merry Christmas. Look, I'm sorry I didn't finish the 25 Days of Horrible Holiday Decorations. I was sick, like, sicker than I've been in a long, long time. This illness not only caused me to miss two days of work, but it kept me confined to my bed and rendered me unable to care about anything, most of all this blog. Then, when I started feeling better, I was in New Jersey, away from my computer. Then when I returned from Jersey, it was Christmas Eve and I was tired. And now, as my wife and daughter nap following a morning of rabid present-opening, I am back and ready to tell you guys about the TV shows I watched and loved this year. So, here they are: my favorite television programs of 2012.
Girls: There was a weird backlash against this show, in particular its creator/star, Lena Dunham, that I don't fully understand. I think it has something to do with the fact that Dunham, along with the bulk of her supporting cast, grew up rich and privileged or something. If Dunham wasn't so talented and funny, this would be a legitimate complaint, but the fact is, as far as I see it anyway, Dunham is one of the funniest, most talented voices in modern comedy. Girls is one of the best written shows on TV. I love how Dunham writes and I find the characters she's created endlessly fascinating, dark and funny, especially Adam. I'm not sure why some people have such a problem with Dunham, but she got a second season and you're still complaining about her on the internet, so, I mean, you know...
Favorite episodes/moments: "The Return"; "Welcome to Bushwick a.k.a. The Crackcident," in which Shoshanna (played by David Mamet's daughter) accidentally smokes crack believing it to be weed; "She Did"
The League: Beginning with the birth of little Chalupa Batman and ending with a Taco Corp New Years party in which everyone shit their pants simultaneously, The League provided another solid season of dirty, dirty laughs.
Favorite episodes/moments: "The Freeze Out"; can I just every moment was my favorite?
The Walking Dead: I judge different genres of TV shows on different scales. For comedy programs I'll often ask myself "How many laughs per minute are there?" or "How many of the actors on this show have appeared on the Earwolf network." For TV shows of the drama/fantasy/sci-fi/horror genre I'll ask, "How hard will this make me cry and/or want to violently puke my guts out?" The Walking Dead is expert at both of these things. I don't think I've cried harder during any episode of TV this year than I did during "Killer Within." But Walking Dead wasn't all blubbering and throwing up in 2012. It was also fairly damn exciting. I actually enjoyed the slowness of Season 2, however, I felt myself growing antsy during the first few episodes of this season. Once The Governor showed up though, Season 3 really took off for me. Plus, as is my tradition, I DVRd the first half of the season and watched it in the span of one day (my second sick day, to be exact), so thanks everybody who posted spoilers on their Facebook pages all year long. I really appreciated it. Jerks.
Favorite episodes/moments: "Killer Within" tore me up, man. I'm still smarting from that one.
Comedy Bang Bang: Scott Aukerman's Comedy Bang Bang podcast is one of my favorite things period (animal, mineral, phantasm). It is the closest thing to speak to my precise sense of humor that I've ever come across and because of this I've found that I need its essential nutrients to survive, not unlike other people need insulin or air. So you can probably imagine my excitement when Mr. Aukerman turned his podcast into a real, honest-to-goodness TV show. If you can't imagine my excitement, I'd describe as akin to an infinite number of excitable nerdboys discovering an infinite number of Nintendo 64s beneath their Christmas trees. Or maybe I'm exaggerating. Anywho, the Comedy Bang Bang TV show was, is even, one of the funniest programs to ever grace the deep cable dial and I for one hope it returns next year. If it doesn't though, I'll still have the podcast to keep my warm and sustain my life.
Favorite episodes/moments: "Episode 2: Amy Poehler Wears A Black Jacket & Grey Pants"; Tommy Shalders, professional bird-caller; "Walking To Work":
How I Met Your Mother: For all of it's irritating wheel-spinning and "what's-up-with-Barney-and-Robin" bullshit, How I Met Your Mother has been on a roll recently. I'm pretty indifferent to the recent announcement that the show has been picked up for another season (I'm glad, sorta, but it just means more of Ted not meeting his future kids' mother and, thus, more of his future kids having to sit there in the den listening to endless stories about their "Aunt" Robin being barren. Seriously, how long have those kids been sitting there listening to Bob Saget' ramble? Are we supposed to believe that this is a single evening? Poor future kids.), but I'm still in for whatever the show's creators want to throw at me as long as it continues to be as funny and weird as it has been thus far.
Favorite episodes/moments: Robin's constant state of annoyance whenever Patrice is around; "The Final Page: Parts 1 & 2"; Chris Elliot as Lily's dad; any and all references to Marshall performing stand-up.
Parks and Recreation: Simply put, NBC's Parks and Recreation is my very favorite show on television currently. It might very well be my favorite TV show of all-time, however I will not know this until the end of my life. When I grow old and find myself on my deathbed, first, I pray that it is not the demon-possessed bed from the appropriately named Death Bed: The Bed That Eats, because that would be an extremely uncomfortable way to go for as old as I am in this scenario (roughly 97-years-old). I can't imagine being eaten by a Satanic bed would be comfortable at any age, but as 97-year-old, it's got to be a whole lot worse. Secondly, as I lay dying, I shall reflect on the kabillions of hours of television I've watched over my long lifespan and decide which entertained me most. I'm predicting now that it will be Parks and Recreation. Stay tuned to this blog for details, or just check back in 64 years.
Favorite episodes/moments: "Sex Education"; Ben's proposal to Leslie; "Ben's Parents"; this, oh God, this!